Emotions underlie the majority of the stress we experience, influence our decisions, provide the motivation for our actions, and create the textures that determine our quality of life.
Unmanaged emotions can be the source of mental chaos.
Together, both quality of life and mental chaos form the basis for much of my work in coaching families who feel they are overwhelmed by a society that seems to no longer value the family unit as much as in the past.
Arlie Hochschild is an American social thinker and sociologist, who believes that the family is our most precious and mutually powerful form of emotional commitment. When that commitment is not honored, either by society at large, or by parents working too many hours, an unhealthy balance and mental chaos starts to creep into our relationships and emotional reactions occur.
Emotions such as anxiety, anger, frustration, sadness, fear, confusion, shame and guilt show up and play havoc and will build unless managed and dealt with. It is one of the differences between humans and horses. Humans contemplate and can become almost paralyzed by overwhelming emotions, whereas horses never think deeply about how they feel – they assess the situation in terms of survival and if there is no danger, they simply go back to grazing. Would it not be great if we could just graze through life?
Emotions are valuable, and offer a bounty of benefits. Once we are able to process and cope with them effectively, we can learn a lot about ourselves and our needs. Emotions send us important messages about our and help us connect with others and accomplish great things. Emotions carry gifts with them…once you have identified the emotion and its message, it is time to take action.
Ask yourself if there’s anything you can do to solve the situation; what needs to be protected, released, restored, avoided, or celebrated? How can you get grounded, define healthy boundaries, and renew yourself?
If you feel you need some help in figuring out how to work through your emotions and how your family can be restored as the unit that matters, call me for a FREE discovery session. Coaching can unlock the grip that un-addressed emotions have on you and allow you to go back to grazing…and enjoying life!